Quicksand of Thought

Here is something that I originally wrote many years ago, actually a decade and half to be precise. Life has changed a lot for me from then to now, but some lessons endure the life and time changes. Sharing it with you with a hope that it will re-introduce you with something that you have known all along and heard many time.

Quick Sand of Thought

When you are in quick sand, the more you try to come out the more you are trapped in it. It swallows you faster if you are fighting to come out. A bad mood is just the same. The more you force yourself to appear normal the weirder gets. Mind rules the bad mood and makes it worse every moment. It can be felt very easily. Accept the moment and detach from the mind, and see. Most of the times the bad feeling will not go. But it will be managed better. The quick sand will be there but it wont swallow you faster and then when you are still in the quick sand, you might see the end of the rope which is tied to the near by tree and someone left it there just for people like you. Or when you are still you might recollect an old technique to come out of quick sand, which you learned in a martial art book in past life. Or even a miracle may happen and the giant bird will come from nowhere to swoop you out and drop you near the oasis. I know most of this appears like a fairy tale, but first of all miracles do happen, and secondly when you are in the quick sand of thought, the chance of this miracle is 100%. Because you are the master of that universe. The sand is created by your mind, the trap is created by your mind and it is your own mind telling you that you are being pulled down and will eventually be crushed and perish in it.  Most of us are able to detach ourselves from the mind at this juncture, but those few who fail at this point, are those who may end up doing something stupid.

Situations can be tough at times. And the perception can make them even tougher. Life situations are the stimuli that the mind reacts to that. Most of us have noticed that during the times of ambiguity, we start thinking bad thoughts. One spouse is not back home in time and not picking phone mostly the other fears an accident. The simple reasons like excess work, traffic jam, flat tire, drained phone battery etc won’t ever be on the top of the mind. Mind can not have those things in its list as mind has to play the game and a simple reason will not give mind any room to play. Sadly however strong one appears from outside, the mind still can be a pessimist in parts. The only way around is detach from mind.

I, and my mind are not the same. My thoughts does not mean the same as I. My thoughts are just a part of me, so are my dreams, my ideas, my relations with people and my behavior. I identify myself with anyone of these and I am in for trouble. Refrain to state “___ because that is how I am” more you say this, easier it becomes to believe this lie. Don't mean to suggest lacking consistency. Just to avoid stereo typing one self. Identifying oneself with any of the above causes confusion. It is just like having two hands with five fingers in each, but tying all with a string except thumb and index finger of dominant. Now how hurting that can be? And how foolish too?

Idea is to have instantaneous joy or sorrow but not build an account to carry it forward. When you detach from the mind, you will accept and enjoy the praise when you get it. You will accept and feel bad to be neglected or denounced. But only when that happens. Those moments are lived and when the moment is over it is over. The present moment is what we live always, neither past not future and that is all one needs to learn. On a self-analysis one may find that most troubles are manifested by mind wandering in past or future.

The quicksand will not bother you much during 'NOW'. Because ‘now’ is the oasis, there is no quicksand in here. The quicksand is just when you are jumping between past and future. The right way is from past to future is through the present. The present that lives, the present that is the only paved road. Past is a good teacher and future is a good motivator, but both should work towards a better NOW. That is the only right way.

One don’t have to wait to say no to mind only when it pushes to limits. ‘No’ can be said a lot before that. Just accept the feeling and stay present. If you want to learn from past, just think about a few very good things and a few very bad things that happened to you. Then tell yourself that all those things good or bad are over and now is here. The journey between ups and downs, triumphs and failures, joy and sorrow, that’s what life is. The reality is that nothings stays past its time. Every event comes and goes. When things are bad, stop thinking and sinking; just tell yourself, “It will pass, just like other things did” You don’t have to go crazy in quicksand. The quicksand of thought just needs one miracle that only you can perform. Just stay calm and tell yourself, “It will pass, no matter what.” Rest assured, that is how it will be; that is how it has been since the time. It always pass, no matter what. Just be calm and perform the miracle, “Hocus Pocus bad thoughts go away, No time for you, I have a busy day” this is what you may chant. I tried it and it feels so silly, silly enough to compel you think of a better line. That thought to a better line can be the miracle needed to be out of the quicksand. No harm trying.

My 6 year old always asks during any journey (long or short) “Papa, Are we there?” and I always reply, “No! We are never there, we are always here.” And the whole family laughs. I hope one day both my kids will know what I meant by that and use it during their personal journeys to avoid stepping into any quicksand.