Silent Refrigerator

“Is it cooling?” Yes. “Do the vegetables stay fresh?” Yes. “The freezer and ice maker are working?” Yes. “then what is the problem?”

“आवाज़ ही नहीं करता ” (It doesn’t make any sound) The lady says innocently. The service technician gives her an awesome smile and responds, “this is the new technology madam, it works silently.” And. We all laugh from the other side of the television screen.

This was a refrigerator commercial that was aired very regularly in India in eighties and nineties. Not sure if you may remember that commercial. It so vivid in my memory, that it plays in mind and always makes me smile.

How innocent and yet how wrong that consumer was. The refrigerator is doing its job fine, but still the owner calls for repair, because it stays silent. We all can laugh at that and it ends here. However, on a more serious note we all do something similar in our lives. Although not with refrigerators only, but also with people. And mostly people who matter.

I look around in families, society, schools, offices, politics, media and I see many such refrigerators. No one bothers if they freeze water to make ice or if they keep the vegetables cold and fresh; but are happy knowing that those make sound. And in the recent times at many places, the sound they make has become more important attribute than their performance at cooling.

And like refrigerators only times the need for cooling takes precedence over the sound is when the ‘sound maker’ has the vegetables rotten and the ice-cream has melted. But in most cases, it is too late when one discovers. The contents entrusted to the refrigerator are rotten already.

As parents, as teachers, as professionals as friends, as voters, as managers, as coaches, as mentors and as people, it is our responsibility to nurture and take care of those that are cooling with or without making sound. Cooling is the only important function for any refrigerator, sound is just a byproduct (wanted or unwanted)

We owe this to ourselves and to those who will follow. After all most of the past inventions that we all take for granted in our lives today had a “non-sound making refrigerator” (commonly called an introvert) behind them.

Holi Hai !!!

" बुरा ना मानो होली है !!" (Don’t feel bad it is holi)

Everyone who has grown up in India (or have watched hindi movies) must have heard this line. Truly Holi is the day when there is no reason to feel bad. Unlike Diwali the festival of lights celebrated as the victory of good over evil in the worldly sense. Holi is the time to celebrate the victory over ones own senses and enjoy. Cherish the blessings and the colorful surroundings. Demolish inner demons like greed, ego, anger, false pride.  Smear the friends and everyone in bright colors signifying the blessing that life is. Get yourself smeared in the colors and become a person who is clean, away from any anger and ego. With rainbow painted faces when one smiles and shows the white teeth, they appear silly and beautiful and pure.

In my schooling, college and early job years in India, I had always waited for Holi with great anticipation. My favorite festival as I had always said and believed. However, in last almost 2 decades living in the US, especially in the east coast with a cold march when the festival is and the job responsibilities have made the celebration almost non-existent. Watching photos and videos of family and friends in India from their Holi celebrations is the only solace. And then is taking a small amount of color usually after office on Holi and putting little dots on the beautiful faces of my wife and kids.

This year is different, Today was holi and I was not home, travelling for work. A few thousand miles away. This morning When I woke up in the hotel, it was very different from waking up on Holi in the past years. No one said Happy holi and no one heard me say Happy Holi.  Don’t feel bad it is Holi (बुरा ना मानो होली है !!) but I felt very bad because it was not any other day but Holi, and no one around. Tomorrow evening when I plan to reach home, holi will be over and I will have missed it. So how could I not feel bad?

With these thoughts I started my day and went for what I had planned at work. Still not able to shake it all off.

Then the holi miracle happened, My evening meeting got canceled, the key contact I was going to meet had developed an infection, early in the morning which worsened over the day and by noon he had to cancel the meeting. So I was freed up. And then I checked, the airline had a seat available in the evening flight that can take me home late at night. Late at night but today. So I will be home and will do our ritual of color in the evening (Okay! late night; but why be picky 😊) 

After all it is Holi and Bura na Mano Holi hai!!!

HAPPY HOLI ALL!!!!

PS: I reached home almost 10 minutes before midnight, and kids were asleep, so had a happy holi good-night kiss instead of colors. The picture above is from a year ago. No matter what; it was a very Happy and blessed Holi!

Circle of Time

Are you from a different planet? I asked; though he appeared very familiar, yet very different. He laughed, “no I am not, I am from earth; though not the earth you claim to know.”

Are you telling me that you are from some hidden civilization or are you suggesting that you are time traveler from past or future? I teased.

Past is future! he said more as a matter of fact statement than a philosophical one.

Like forward is backward? I teased again.

Forward and backward, Front and back, ahead and behind are only for linear single dimension entities. Backward is forward and ahead is behind in a circle. That is what time is, a circle, is it not? And so Past is Future. He stated, as if trying to tell something as basic as alphabets to a toddler.

I looked at his face with disbelief, some fear, some surprise and a million other emotions. I knew that face.

Time is a circle, he repeated, you know that. He looked me in the eye. You know that time is a circle, the cycle of time as you have heard and read. All philosophers from your part of that circle have always referred to time as a wheel, or a circle or a stone flour mill. You have been contemplating it for so many months, years and still you don’t believe me?

I knew I believed him. I knew what he was saying was a thought that had always tormented and teased me. I knew I never had courage to say is out loud for the fear of retribution or the fear of being mocked. But when I hear the stories from the past, many of those sound too futuristic to me. When I read about the pyramids, the great wall, the angel visitations in Bible, the theory of Yugas in Vedas, the Brahamastras in Hindu scriptures (and the forbidden use of those) and a lot more, I always feel that what happened in the past is in fact waiting to happen in the future. The time is a circle. The time is cyclic and not linear as we have believed for so many years.

I looked at his face again trying to know why he looked so familiar. And then a faint smile on his lips gave it away. He was me. He was me from a different point on the circle. You don’t always have to go follow the circle, he said, you can cut through and take the shorter path to go across. Time; as you know is a dimension like some others you travel through. You know that! don’t give me the look that you don’t know it. He said with the authority of a concerned teacher.

Don’t tell me that you didn’t believe in the stories of the time travelers and those who moved across the ages and the cosmos like someone roaming in their back yard.

As a matter of fact, you don’t have to tell me anything, I know how tormented you are with knowing what you think you can not prove. So, I am here, trying to tell you that you are right. You know and you don’t have to know any different. Don’t force the linear time world view on yourself. Prove it to others or not but believe in it yourself. One day if not you, someone will prove it. Prove it for some time, for people to take it for granted, like they take solar system for granted now, instead of the pre-Galilean flat earth scenario. And then they will forget as they have done many times over. But they will forget, only to be reminded again. The snippets of texts and monuments and stories, philosophical nuggets left as crumbs on the path, just for you and those who are like you to pick and think and decide and speak. Someone will see those nuggets to be worth exploring and then the cycle will be repeated.

Knowing and ignorance, just like time are universally cyclic too.

We both smiled. I knew we were one, I knew I could have asked him for the shorter path to move from one side of the circle to other. And I was sure he would have not only told but also held my hand to take me along to that other side of the circle, only to return back to where I was. So being where I was appeared equally fine. 


I would like to see you on the other side but then I have to find my own path to be there. Knowing that if there can be a short part, there will be a million. I am sure I will find them one day. If not now may be sometime in the past or future. The good part of the circle is that it has no start and no end. So, time being the circle is nothing but hope (as a circle has no end)

Past and future, knowing and ignorance, start and end all are the same. And You and I are same as well. See you on the way one day. He winked and turned back. I am sure I will see him some day again. 

I remember seeing him in the past too or was that in the future that awaits?

Easy Understanding

Run! What are you doing? 

Everyone heard her scream that in to the aisle. This was at the airport and I was sitting waiting for my flight. Obviously, she had stepped out of flight That was delayed on arrival. Also, it was obvious that she had to rush to make a tight connection. 

Her companion hears her plea and emerges from behind the crowd running. Instant sympathy for the man carrying a large backpack and a shoulder bag while rolling a suitcase. The lady back there asking him to run was carrying her beautiful LV shoulder bag.

The guy defies the crowd and somewhat defies the laws of physics to respond to that call to run. He quickly catches up with the lady who strangely slowed down as he neared.

Why are we not running? He asked, in a surprised voice. 

 

Don't rush me now. It is you who was behind, and it is you because of who we will miss the flight if we do. Her honest answer.

He nodded, knowing and accepting that it would be his fault if they miss the connecting flight.

Some relations are so strong that not a lot explaining is needed and understanding comes easy. 👨

2018 - Quick Memoir

So New year, bring it on! We are ready for more stories, more blessings, more fun, more success, more collaborations, more togetherness and more Life. This is how I ended my 2017 Memoir last year..

 … and the year that followed and just ended yesterday kept me honest to that promise

The year was filled with many FIRSTS.

A first ever full family summer. When my parents and my brother, sister in law and their kids were here in the US. All 10 from the family under 1 roof in Virginia. All 10 together in flights, amusement parks, malls and so on. We even made team jerseys to commemorate the togetherness.

 

Another first this summer was a new job. Though at the start of the year I had never thought of that possibility, but by mid-year that happened and happened very suddenly and happened so well

Another first was a proud dad moment when my older son getting US President medal for educational excellence in elementary school. A proud dad moment that had lasted for many days and resurfaces again regularly.

There was a first ever visit to Mexico, for a short vacation towards last week of the year. saw some wonderful beaches and met some wonderful people. Climbed to the top of the ruins of a Mayan temple, which may be even a last as there were talks about a government suggested ban on climbing starting early 2019.

Oh! and another in the lines of firsts; My high school buddy visited just yesterday. A reunion that took a few decades to happen and was worth every single minute of it. Hope to see you a lot sooner again buddy. I will try to start converting the hope to a plan soon. 

The year that just ended saw even more travel than the previous. Though it was mostly domestic but ended up taking almost 50 flights and around 10 train trips in the year that just ended. A lot more than my usual in the past years. I made friends with the airports and the hotels. And started a blog on conversations with the ride share drivers. 

Staying honest to the promise made many new friends this year. Was blessed with some excellent new folks in life (both work and personal front). Faced a cruel situation during the year. Those whom I speak to regularly know how much stress that situation had offered. Made me toggle between self-doubt and building back self-belief, just to lose it again and then trying to revise it daily. You who supported me during that time, know how grateful I am. However honestly, I am more grateful than I ever mentioned. Suddenly one fine morning that situation gave up on being in my head and resolved itself. I still had some wounds to heal and some scars to lighten, but I think I have enough blessings to get all that done.

Now that the “last teen” year of this century starts (Borrowed term); I hope the life moves from responsive to more proactive era.

A year ended, a new year started. The calendars are changed. The dates ticking, as fast as last year; with 1 day already almost gone from the new year. And before the day tuns to weeks and months; guess it time for some quick resolutions

üIf another nasty situation arises ever again in life (hope it never does) then just remember that Self-doubt has no place in the mind so make sure that unwanted tenant leaves the house immediately

ü  Work for living and laugh to live (and live to laugh)

ü  Stay always dependable (home or office)

ü  Make more friends

ü  Burn more than consumed (calories and stress)

ü  Write regularly

ü  Enjoy better time with kids and wife

ü  Talk to distant family members every day

ü  Celebrate moments (not just victories and festivals)

ü  Never give up on a chance to see the rising Sun

ü  Never miss a chance to share a story with the kids

ü  Laugh

ü  Pray 

ü  Celebrate 

ü  Stay grateful

With a prayer for everyone’s happiness I should welcome the new year. A year to write new stories and to continue witnessing life in more ways than ever. A year to spread joy and blessings and keep on gathering more joy and more blessings in the process. A year to live and love and learn. A year to stay grateful for all the blessings!

WELCOME 2019

Conversations, Characters and a Ride share - 5th

Dream to Reality

The last post was my tribute to dreamers, and this one is a story of one who couldn’t stop dreaming. One who realized a dream and then dreamt again and realized that to just dream again and kept the cycle going. I know I cant do full justice to his story, but still will share to my best effort.

I landed in Pittsburgh and had 2 hours before my 1st meeting. Somehow, I decided against waiting and heading direct to the meeting location. I am glad that I did, as I could meet my most interesting ride share driver.

He must have been in early 70's. Wearing a neatly ironed button-down shirt he greeted me with a smile and excellent mannerism. I stepped on the front seat and we started chatting. I usually don't come at airport he said but today was different. So what places you usually go to? I asked. See I am a full-time grandfather who part time does other things. Usually I take my 4 grandchildren to various classes and places and offer ride shares in between. That is interesting, I smiled. Yes, family is a beautiful thing. I came to know the value of family while living alone for many years. Aha that can be a story worth listening to, I thought. When and why were you alone. In my youth I worked for secret services. For many years I was posted in Europe, secret ops. So, I was not allowed to even befriend anyone. So, it was a lonely time. My awesome wife lived in Pennsylvania, I will visit her twice a year, 1 week each time. That is when I realized how important she was and how important family is. I could somewhat relate to what He said. But you were serving the nation keeping everyone safe and sacrificing family life for that is a proud thing. I tried to pep talk him. He grinned, you sound like someone from secret service days. Honestly, I see myself as the peace maker. There was Intel that we gathered and shared which could help avoid conflicts, so I sure am proud of it. Also no regrets on family front, I made up for lost family life and friendships after I moved from secret services to local police department. And then retired early. My older son is a doctor and younger works for federal government. And my wife is as beautiful and caring as she was 30 years ago. 

Great I am happy for you. Must be an amazing life working for secret services then police department and raising a wonderful family and finally retiring to become a full-time grandfather. Very exciting life if you look from my vantage point.

Yes, but being a full-time granddad is like a day job. Evenings are different. I knew that moment that the story had a new chapter. I am all ears I said. So, evenings, well two weekdays and both weekend days I play drums in my band. Yep have a band.  I wanted to learn some music ever since I was a kid. But never had chance, about 4 years ago I attempted to learn something. Actually; anything would have been okay with me. But my music teacher told me that I had good sense of rhythm and asked me to try drums. I was surprised at discovering that I had good sense of rhythm, he chuckled. So, now my drums are my 2nd love, of-course my wife stays on the top rank. We started our band. The lead guitarist is a 60-year-old neuro-surgeon youngest in the band. Our lead singer is my age and a retired professor, keyboard guy is an old grumpy soul who would never share what he does outside the band life. We don't dare ask too. I think either mafia or secret service, he broke into a laugh as he said. But good thing we play at the plaza and now we have started having some shows. We will be playing in the local fair next month. 

I am impressed I said, so is that all or something else? He laughed, no that is all, for now. May be one day we will sign a big Hollywood contract. I hope I retire as good as you, when I do. Don't just hope he said, Plan. We all plan our life, our jobs, promotions, weekends, vacations and everything. But when the age hits we just retire, without planning. I see that same as committing slow suicide. So, if you know what I mean, plan for retirement. And please don't plan the way your bank would say, how much money will you have and how your medical will be taken care of etc. Plan what will you do in your time. Plan how will you celebrate life and not having to go to an office every day. Plan what will you give to people around you. 

Yes sir, I hear you. I’ve seen someone else like you who lives a few thousand miles away and proudly I will add, he is my father. I wish two of you could meet one day and compare notes. I said while getting out of the car. Why not? he responded, bring him to Pittsburgh next month on 20th he will be my guest for the concert. 

I know I couldn’t keep my promise and see your concert, but I also know one day I will be able to do that. You with your band and your thinking will not be difficult to find, next I visit Pittsburgh Sir. But before signing off I will sincerely thank you for your valuable advise and request all my friends and family reading this go through the retirement plan paragraph again and make a commitment to your selves. We all can be comparing notes a few decades away to see who planned it well.

Conversations, Characters and a Ride share - 4th

Dreamers 
Here are some small snippets of professions that few of my ride share drivers were from, This is a tribute to few of the many dreamers I’ve met on these ride shares.

It was snowing and I was in my business suit when I rode the vehicle. The driver was very polite, from the way he spoke he reminded me of an old friend. So I asked if he too was from central Africa, just like my friend. Qui! he responded. I am from Cameroon. That was an instant conversation starter. What do you do Sir, he asked? I work for a consulting firm I responded. I want to do something like that, he said. But very few opportunities in my field of expertise, he sighed. What field will be that? I asked. I worked in Cameroon for a cellphone service provider. I was a BSS engineer. He mentioned. Most of my friends tell me that in the US only way to get a good job in technology is if you are a software engineer. I am trying to earn money by driving and helping some businesses on their WiFi network maintenance to earn enough to learn software development. I started as a BSS engineer in India almost 20 years ago, I said. And I still work in telecom industry, I handed him my business card; Send me your resume if you want and may be something can work on BSS or network side for you. His eyes sparkled. After a few days he was working as a Network engineer with one of my friend’s firm. Ironically now after a few years he is an expert in enterprise WiFi. He occasionally calls me and we do talk about that day he picked me from my house to drop me to the airport. I always feel that I recommended his name to my friend because I had felt his passion for his dream, when I had met him. I am glad that I was in his car that day else how would I tell my friend that he owes his best performer to my recommendation. One day I will get a chance to work with you my friend, you know you are worth it.

Another day, late evening from airport to home I met another dreamer. He was driving the ride share from 7pm to 11pm daily as he told me. What do you do before 7, I asked? Oh, I work for The airlines from 9am to 6pm. Curently, I am a baggage handler. But I will not be that for long. He said in a gritty voice. I am working in my degree in avionics. I know I started late, but while growing up I never had thought about a career. I started as a porter at the Airport and then learnt how much fun engineering can be. So I work long hours on weekdays and attend school over weekends. You know what, I was interviewed by a major airline last week and I think I will fill a role in engineering team. They are giving me a trainee role till I graduate. I am impressed, I said, you sure should be proud of yourself. I am sir he replied, but more than that my wife and my 5 year old son are proud of me. That is what I want to see more than anything. 
Dream on my friend as the world is made a better place by those who dream. I said.  I could see proud in his smile when I was leaving the car. I knew I have a story to tell my kids that night. 

I hope I see the other side of his story one day. I am sure he has fulfilled his dream by now. And I hope he already had his next dream. Because dreamers make the world worthwhile.


I remember writing an article many years ago and there was a line that have kept me going on the dream chase sharing that while we are talking of dreamers- 
 Dreams don't have handles to hold on to; but they do have wings ! 

So all dreamers out there, just don't hold back, nurture them and one day your dreams will spread the wings and fly, taking you along!