Deep Inside

 Having asked a simple question "how are you holding up?" He smiled and narrated  this episode in response

 Few steps more and then all is going to be fine. This is not the first time he felt this way. His parched lips needed water and his blistered feet were resisting to move. The Sun felt so hot as if he could touch its burning surface if he had stretched his arm just a little bit. 

No shade in sight but the water is just a few steps away, he could see the blue shimmering surface of the small lake not too far away. But the lake kept on moving farther away as he tried to step closer to it.

 This is not the lake; you know this is a mirage his mind told him. You cannot be a fool to not know the difference between the mirage and oasis? A small voice angrily asked from the corner of his mind. They all left, turned or stopped and some got far ahead of you. You are all by yourself, he heard the small voice tell him.

He ignored and took another step. And then one more and so on. 

Deep inside he knew there was no Oasis. Deep inside he knew this was a mirage. Deep inside he knew he was not a fool. Deep inside he knew he had come too far to turn back. Deep inside he knew stopping there meant the end of it all. Deep inside he knew it was hopeless. Deep inside he knew he can't give up. Deep inside he knew he would go on till he cannot anymore. Deep inside he had never lost his faith on his feet and Deep inside he had never lost faith in the possibility of a miracle. 

Deep inside he knew he was invincible as long as he was alive.

I may never know that man in the desert or what happened to him in the end. but whenever I think of his story, I always pray that he met the miracle, the hope of which had kept him going. As such lone travelers can always use a prayer. 

Then and Now

Somewhat sleepy and tired; he stepped out of the airplane. It was daylight and he was sleepy. That is what being in the other side of the world will do to you, the mind suggested. He was jetlagged, a term that he had heard but never experienced before. As he stepped out of the jetway he just thought that it was his first step on a land outside his birth country. He was in his 20s. Had lived in hostel many years and travelled for work, but this thought of being in a new country just overwhelmed his mind with so many emotions. Tired, yet excited; hopeful, yet worried; happy and homesick all at once. He knew something has changed

I am not going to stay here forever. Just a short while, will live and learn and explore for a couple of years before I return to where the roots are, he thought silently in his heart while slowly crawling through the long immigration line.

After some paperwork and sleepy answers to immigration officer he moved through customs to main terminal.
In the main terminal, there was a smartly dressed fellow in a black suit, much shorter than himself, carrying a board with his name on it. Yes that will be me; he gestured with a smile and the guy with board  (later he learnt was named Ronnie) started leading him through the aisles and parking lot to the shining black Lincoln towncar. This was his ride arranged by the company he was going to join in a couple of days. Then the car started rolling on roads that he has never seen, places he has never been and feelings he had never had.

Snow on the side of the roads, cold air gently moving the pine trees on the next to the road. This country is so different for where he had come from yet so similar, he thought as the car rolled towards his apartment almost 12 miles east of the airport.

All that feels like a different life time now. That was me 20 years ago; today 3/3/2001.

Difficult to think that was me, I don't even look like him.

A lot happened in last 20 years, most of it I had never thought of that day, 20 years ago. Still it feels a very simple life as is standing here today.

I can count a few things during this period

·        A lot of friendship -Earned 

·        A lot of new people -Learned 

·      A lot of new places- Experienced

·      Some success along the way - Celebrated 

·       Some failures along the way - Coached

Lost hair and youthful looks of yesteryears and lost hair (had to say that again)

Less hair means more experience as you may hear me say (won’t tell if that is true; you may see for yourself)

20 years and I can tell myself again that all the stress and worries are useless, as life changes daily

Or what changes everyday is called Life