“You enjoy the weather and the coffee.” She
said from the other side of the phone. “Well ! Of course,” was my response. The
weather had been very hot lately and today unexpectedly it rained for
a couple hours. It rained enough to wash and drench the whole city. Now the coffee; I am a big fan of strong coffee from Starbucks. I had
asked a friend of mine to bring me a large mug of coffee while returning from lunch. As I was busy with the work today that I didn’t get time for lunch. The other thing that I loved was cooler temperatures and just before
this rain it was above 100 degree Fahrenheit for last few days, this rain just
cooled it down to high seventies. However the weather forecast says that this
cooling was short lived, it will reach back to 100 later in the day.
Still at this moment it was mid seventies
outside so it was worth enjoying. When I thought about it again, I couldn’t
help but smile. It was mid seventies OUTSIDE. Inside the office it was the
same, 70 degree as always. I stopped working for a while and moved towards the
other side of the floor, the side that had the huge glass wall from where I could
see outside. The roads outside were wet and the trees had appear washed and
rejuvenated with the rain. It actually looked lot more pleasant outside than
usual. So it really is a reason to enjoy, though the fact is that nothing
changed for me due to this rain. I am still in the same chair, doing the same
work, under the same cold 70 degree set air-conditioning, thanks to the excellent
air-conditioning in the office building. I thought of my friend who works just
down the street and who has a sliding door window in his office room. I am sure
he will be sitting on his chair with that window open at this moment, smelling
the freshness or the air and hearing to the sweet melody of the rain. He might
be even singing in chorus with the trees and the birds who just had this big
relief from the heat.
So now I am happy, enjoying, though the truth
is that nothing changed for me. Just the scene outside the glass wall
changed. The Screen Saver on the big screen of the outside world changed. I can
not feel the drop in outside temperature as I never felt the heat outside as
well. I know the flowers and the leaves and the grass are more fragrant now as
the soot is washed off them and the heat is taken out, still I can not smell
that fragrance sitting in here. The rain drops falling on the glass on the
other side of this glass wall must be creating a melodious symphony, but my
ears are deaf to that melody, thanks to the sound proof glass windows of the office.
So nothing changed and still I am happier. May be from the data bank at the
back of my mind, I experienced it all. My mind played an old memory which made
me feel the rain on my temples. It made me smell the fragrant, freshly washed
trees and flowers. It made me tap my foot to the melodious raindrop symphony.
It made me sing in chorus with the birds outside. I could feel the joy making
my face glow and making me enjoy everything around me, even the work that had
been quite frustratingly challenging for last few days, and of course the
coffee, my warm and sweet cup of Starbucks.
The rain is over and it will be even hotter
(and humid) when I step out of this office later in the day. I know that, I
even know I will not like stepping out in that kind heat, just a few hours from
now. Even after I know all this I am happy for something that happened out
there. This all makes me think, it is never the weather or the situation, not
even the coffee, it is always the perception that changes the things. I could
have made my self upset thinking that things are getting so good outside and I
am stuck with my computer and my chair and the crazy work in this situation.
It is same as watching a movie where good wins
over evil in the end, and some people move out of the theater inspired and
feeling that what ever evils are there in the life eventually the good in me
will win over it. The other bunch of people walks out of the same movie cursing
their fate that if it could happen right for the guy in the movie why is it not
happening for me? And both of them are right.
When ever I am gripped with any similar thoughts,
they always end up in the same understanding.
“Things do not
change; the perception does. The life states are always the same, the way we
see life, changes the way we live it. And the way we live in turn changes the
way we see. And this whole changes the way we are and the way we are changes
the way we live.”
The
power is never out there, it is always in here. When ever I reach to this
conclusion, that is when ever I think about similar things, I feel really empowered.
The flip side of it is that I loose all my excuses when I feel this way. If I
have the power to change things for myself and for people around me, then I am
in control. And when I am in control then I own what ever happens. Good or bad,
what ever happens is my ownership. Now this in turn puts everything off hook.
The weather, the people, the seasons, the work, the health, the relations, the
love, the hate, the success, and the failure everything becomes secondary.
Everything is either a life situation or an outcome of my actions and my
decisions or may be both. But which ever way I see it, I am the one to be
credited for all good and I am the one to be blamed for all wrong.
With power come the responsibility and this is
the age old fact. I can not change it, no one can. And thinking again and again
leads to discovering again and again the same fact, that my life is always my
responsibility. I am free to choose my response and my life and hence I am
responsible for my life. And not only that I am some bit responsible for the
life of everybody around me. I pose many a time as a stimulus for people and
make them choose their acts, similarly as the people around me make me choose
my act.
Above all I am significantly responsible for
her, and she for me.
“Who is she?” “Is that what you just asked?” Did
you miss the start? She is the one who made me think with her one small
comment. Read again the 1st line the opening line of this whole
thought chain. It all started with her “You enjoy the weather and the coffee”
comment. She is my wife, my other half (mostly my better half or not so much better at times same as I am for
her.) All I want now is to share this page with her and see how she responds?
She is equally responsible for her life, my life, our life. She shares the
power and hence the responsibility. I did enjoy the rain and the weather
without feeling it directly because I shared it with her, or rather because she
shared it with me when she asked me to enjoy it. And I chose to enjoy when I
was asked to do so. Happiness is easy to get, if one wants to get it. Isn’t it?
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