From Back of My Notebook - 8

 

Many months since I last looked at the back of my notebook, and loosely scribbled items when I sew them together, it gave me the below thoughts on success and failure, see if you agree and share what you think…

On Failure

·         Failure is a lonely place

·         Still, you are not alone, your shame stays with you in failure

·         Invite courage to that spot and you can start moving away from failure

·         Do leave the failure there when you move, else it will keep on haunting you

·         But do remember to carry the lesson with you when you move

·         Lesson may be hidden somewhere so you will need to look for it with keen eye

 

On Success

·         Success attracts company

·         Still, you may be lonely as arrogance may born with success 

·         Invite humility there and you can start being not lonely in success

·         Throw the arrogance away when you start embracing humility, it may try to sneak back in

·         Do remember to carry grace with you along with success and humility

·         Grace combined with Success and Humility makes a great team

Previously posted Notes form back of my notebook Below

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2013/03/back-of-my-notebook.html

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2014/10/morefrom-back-of-my-notebook.html

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2017/03/3rd-serving-from-back-of-my-notebook.html

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2017/12/4th-serving-from-back-of-my-notebook.html

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2018/03/a-5th-serving-from-back-of-my-notebook.html

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2020/09/6th-page-from-back-of-my-notebook.html

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2021/09/from-back-of-my-notebook-7.html

तय है

बचपन से कई बार सुना है  "चिंता ताकि कीजिये, जो अनहोनी होय " बात अच्छी लगती थी, पर एक बात समझ नहीं आती, कि किस बात को अनहोनी कहें | तो मैंने सोचा क्यों ना एक फहरिस्त बनाये उन बातों की जो अनहोनी नहीं हैँ | बातें जो हमेशा होती है, बातें जो तय हैँ. आप भी सोचिये और बताईये कितनी ऐसी बातें हैँ जो आपकी नज़र में तय हैँ | फिर उनको होनी मान कर उनपे चिंता छोड़ देंगे | तो क्या तय है|

तय है 

इस मौसम का जाना तय है

उस मौसम का आना तय है

दुःख -सुख घूमें एक पहिये पे 

इक आना दूजा जाना तय है

सहरा की रेत का जलना तय है

दरिया की रेत का भीगना तय है

बुरा हो या बहुत ही बढ़िया

वक़्त का आखिर बीतना तय है

क्यों डरना हर एक कदम पे

कुछ रस्तोँ पे लड़खड़ना तय है

फितरत से है हसना या रोना (क्यों की)

गम और ख़ुशी तो आना-जाना तय है

लकीरों मेँ जो लिखा है होगा

फिर क्यों रोना गिड़गिड़ाना

पर हिम्मत से जो डटे रहें तो

लकीरें भी बदल जाना तय है

मौसम जाना आना तय है

वक़्त बदलते जाना तय है

दुःख सुख चलते रहना तय है 

लकीरें बदल भी जाना तय है 

और हाँ ,

उनका  बात बात पे रूठना और 

मेरा बातों बातों में मानना तय है

Team - What does it mean

TEAM as an Acronym

T  -    Trust

E -     Enthusiasm / Energy/ Enjoyment/ Enablement/ Empathy

A -    Attitude/Action/ Ability/Accountability/ Adaptability

M -   Meaningful/ Memories/ Magic/ Marvel/ Magnificent

Just a fun thing that I have done so many times since my school days. Pick a word and try to build it as an Acronym. Sometimes the results and good and sometimes awesome. However, a very few times the results are intriguing, even enlightening.

This is one of those Acronyms.

When I tried to find words starting with the letters in TEAM, I could find so many starting with E, A and M to make it a meaningful acronym. 

However, without the right T you can not have the TEAM and the only right T in team is TRUST, nothing else.

TEAM Starts with TRUST

 

Welcome 2022

 Another page rolled, another day started, another year has begun. Last many years, I welcomed with Open arms and a few promises to myself. I am never able to keep all promises that I enlist at the start of the year; however, each one of those is worthy of keeping. So if I am able to keep myself honest to even a few of those each year, that is a step in the right direction. So here we are with another recap and another list of new or revised promises

 2021 has been a 365 days long roller coaster. With ups and downs, slow yet labored ascend and steep yet sudden falls, triumphs and heartbreaks and so on. We humans have never been as connected in experience before 2021. So, in some way it has been a unifying year.

The year meant a lot for the world. The big fear of Covid continued to shadow our minds, our rituals, our festivals, and our life. Slowly but surely, we are fighting back, controlling the spread, getting vaccinated and hopefully soon getting a medicinal cure for the disease. 

Amid the scares of delta, delta plus and omicron variants the fight back with vaccines that rolled out throughout the world this year continued to hold the fort strong for the man kind in the battle of mankind vs virus. We are scared; no doubt, but we are not defeated, and we will not be defeated. We are a resilient race.

The World had few major sporting events this year, including the Olympics and Cricket world cup. Both managed and completed with right cautions and restrictions. Both provide much needed relief to the people globally in the form of their favorite sports. Our ability to adapt and adjust was on display along with the skills of competing athletes.  While the players had to adjust to empty stadiums and recorded claps and cheers; the viewers had to adjust to watching and cheering from the safety of their living rooms. We adjusted and adapted but didn’t give up on our favorite sports. We are a resilient race

Schools and business that had seen closures and operational interruptions through out 2020, and part of 2021 started opening with right cautions and adjustments to get back life to normal while still controlling the spread. The school going children, right from early elementary school showed great discipline in wearing masks and exercising caution with no complaints. It was surprisingly pleasing. The adaptability is not a taught trait, but something coded in genes for the entire human race. Afterall we are a resilient race. 

Also, a lot happened on personal front. I made my shortest ever trip to India, after the longest ever gap between the trips. It started a call from my cousin, whom I have not spoken with in more than 10 years. (We both were so busy with our daily lives that important things were forgotten) Her son was getting married in fall and she asked if I could come. I knew I had to go; her call had filled my mind with a million memories from our shared childhood. I met my parents, my brother, sister-in-law and most of my maternal cousins after so many

years. Teasing, laughing, dancing, sharing food, sharing jokes, and above all building a million new memories. With a heart filled with gratitude to almighty for the opportunity and my cousins, nephews and nieces who made it worthwhile with their presence; I returned.

I can write on and on for 2021, but this is about 2022 which started today, so I will welcome 2022 with hope for healing. Some learnings and promises to carry with me in the new year (some repetition from past years, but worthwhile to reaffirm)

Value life – Life is not just breathing and eating. Life is the experience, the togetherness, the warmth that comes with sharing. Value Life and value everything that life brings.

Be grateful – Gratitude is one thing that will never go out of fashion. I look around, there is so much to be grateful for. Right from the 1^st breath I take as I wake up in the morning to each morsel I eat to each email, text, call, I get or send, for my family and friends, for the roof above my head, for the technology I enjoy, for the work and the paycheck, for the health and so much more. I didn’t buy or own any of that. All this is given so all I can do is stay in gratitude for all this and more.

Value relations– Relations make the human experience unique. Many time in past years I have felt hurt or upset at what some one said or did. I repeat my commitment to not react and value relationship above any instantaneous reactions. Some actions can hurt but the relations heal. See keeping the health of relation above all other feelings is worthwhile.

Appreciate more – It is easy to find reasons to appreciate if one watches carefully with a hope to catch something good. I will continue to look for reasons to appreciate. I also will look keenly for moments and actions to appreciate.

No Grudges – Keeping grudges is easy but damaging in long run. So, I will not keep any grudges. I will speak and ask to have better understanding of “behavior blind Spots*” rather than keeping a grudge.

Stay Healthy- Health is wealth, as all of us know. Good health is a blessing. I make commitment to actions leading to maintaining good health and will try to suggest same to everyone around.

Celebrate – Celebrate life and celebrate moments frequently. Life is gift and so is each moment; enjoy it to the fullest

Pray always – Prayer is the most potent way to grow, heal, support and ascend. So keep praying. Not any particular/ religious prayers; my prayer is a dialogue between my heart and the nature almighty. Just share what I liked, what hurt me, what I want to change and what I want to continue, simple statements and then accept the answers received. Be grateful for those answers and continue to pray.

I will wrap this up here with a warm welcome to 2022. A year where we will have to overcome the fear of Covid, live life and continue with our resilience. Afterall we are a Resilient race.

DON’T FORGET TO CELEBRATE !!!

WELCOME 2022

 *behavior blind Spots reference from my recent post https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2021/12/unwet-fish.html 

 

 

 

 

A Brief Dialogue

 

What do you mean you are leaving? You just came, isn’t it? I stated with surprise.

No, but I have been here, for quite some time, almost as much time as I had promised to stay. That was the response, but I was still in disbelief.

Are you sure, you taught me all that you were supposed to? Are you sure you gave all what you came to deliver? My disbelief continued.

Of course, yes; was the confident and reassuring response. But if you learnt

any thing from what I tried to teach is all up to you. So, let me ask did you learn something? Do you feel you are better than where you were when we started this journey? Now the question was turned on me and I was thinking of an appropriate response. But with a smile and reassurance the statement continued; never mind giving me that answer. I am here for a little bit more, so you answer yourself and then tell me if still something can be taught while I am still here.

That is so kind of you, I responded. I sure will spend some time meditating on what I have learnt over the period that you have been here.

And that was my conversation with the year 2021 this weekend.

I am thinking and will try to enlist how the days were in 2021, what was taught, what was learnt, what was missed and what was accomplished. Will come with that list in a few days hopefully!!!!

UNWET FISH ?

“Did the fish know that it was wet?” Of course not, as fish has not ever known dry so the concept of wet will not be even possible. For when fish is dry means it is dead. Sometimes we forget this basic fact when dealing with someone whose behavior does not comply with our standards of good. I am not saying accepting or appreciating if the behavior is bad, but while picking one’s reaction, one must know the vantage point other is seeing it from.  Knowing that for the other complying with your view might not even be an option as they might be fish who is always wet (or dead when unwet).

Lately I have been dealing with someone who always manages to annoy, in every single interaction we had. And that was irrespective of the interaction being in person, or phone or email or any other means possible. To conform my belief on that he is doing all this incorrect is the fact that every single person, who deals with him, end up feeling the same way. This person will never fail this belief, not even 1% of the time. So easy to profile, brand, ignore and voice irritation on his behavior. Now, for ease of further conversation let us call him Mr.“P” as in Problem.

Yesterday I was talking with a friend on a totally different topic, and I asked him at some point, “Did the fish know that it was wet?” Due to some unknown reason, Mr. P’s face flashed in my mind for a moment when I said that. That is when it dawned on me; what if this guy doesn’t even know that there is another way? 

What if someone could tell Mr. P that he may even have amphibious traits if he tries to venture out of water? And what if he indeed was a fish and couldn’t do any different?

I just decided that since I don’t have that level buddy-bond with Mr.“P” so I will not be the one imploring him to try and discover amphibious traits. But I will always see his behavior in the light that he may be a fish who can’t be unwet or an amphibian who was never told that it can survive outside water. So will not judge him going forward. Also doesn’t mean that I will not be annoyed at his behavior, but I will stop carrying my frustration for any minute after my conversation with him is over. I sure hope that Mr. “P” – Problem becomes Mr.“P” – Possibility, in some way.

Oh! by the way I might have similar blind spots that I am not aware of (I am sure I do). But I would hope some of you will show me what is in my blind spots so that I can at least attempt to improve. I want to be out of the water I may be in and know that I could stay well when dry.

PS: "Unwet" was not a word till I wrote this. 

"Buddy-Bond" is again something that I don't recollect being used, but I hope both these convey the meaning that I want to use them for

PPS: If you are confused reading the above, never mind; It is a bit odd topic and if you understood what I meant, then thanks, let us discuss and tell me about my blind spots

मन दर्पण

Have you ever noticed that when your mind is troubled with a thought, no matter how small, everything starts looking different? The clarity of thoughts is lost and most you observe is tainted in that troubled light. The poem below is a humble attempt to pen that feeling down. 

हलचल थोड़ी सी भी हो

तो सब धुंधला कर देती है

पानी ठहरा हो तब ही

दर्पण सा साफ दिखाता है

पानी जैसा ही मन है

भर जाये तो बह निकलता है

पानी की ही तरह, जाने 

कहाँ कहाँ से गुज़रता है'

मन भी जिसको छू ले उस को 

थोड़ा सा नम कर देता है 

पानी सा मन, फिर पानी 

आँखों तक भर देता है 

एक छोटी सी बात का कंकर 

मन की सतह जब छू ले तो 

लाखों तरंगे नयी पुरानी, 

भीतर - बाहर लहराती हैं 

और इस हलचल के चलते 

सब कुछ धुंधला कर जाती हैं 

मन साधु का ठहरा पानी 

दर्पण सा बिम्ब बनाता है 

बस मन की लेहरों को 

थोड़ा संयम में रखना सीखें 

(क्यों की) 

हलचल थोड़ी सी भी हो

तो सब धुंधला कर देती है

पानी ठहरा हो तब ही

दर्पण सा साफ दिखाता है

The pictures you see here are taken by me at various lakes with that reflection in still water.