A Special note for A Special one on A Special day

I write and I write about many things around me. But there are times when one desperately want to write something worthy and finds neither words nor courage to do the same. Today is one such day. Likely one of the most important days when the words should not betray me.

Today that you are turning a teenager. Hard to believe how fast my once little Shaunak has grown and is stepping into the teen life (and has grown almost as tall as I am). A very crucial phase of life is starting today for you

I have a million blessings for you, and I want to back those with a million advises. Not sure how many will stick.

All I can say is dear Son, I have been proud of you most of time. Actually way more proud of you than you have ever been of me. You may at times feel that you deserved an easier father (especially on video game allowance); but I assure you that my love for you covers that shortcoming very well. Any how I am still not sure what 3 houses are you looking for. 😉

But since you are stepping into the teen years, so some ADVICE (that is what a father is for besides other things 😊)

·       Listen to your heart always, but before agreeing to it consult your mom (or me, if she is busy) always

·       Eat well and eat healthy. Taste buds are sometime just a trap...and do exercise regularly

·       Never stop reading (even when you are my age) 

·       Never stop learning, if you know everything about something then rejoice and look for a new area that you can learn about

·       Start writing and start speaking in public forum
·       Never discount the power of your ideas and the power of your thoughts

·      Always Believe in Yourself. Always be proud of yourself and always be humble

·       Always be honest (especially to me and your mom)

·       You can Always count on me and mom (till you don't need us and then we will count on you there after 😀)

·       Your younger brother will always be your best friend. Teach him the values that you want in your best friend (he listens to you always even when he pretends that he doesn't)

·       Laugh frequently, complain never, enjoy everything that life gives.

·       Take full ownership of your actions and the consequences they bring

·       Make world a better place, because you have all what it will take. Only you have to continue nurturing that

·       If ever in doubt, look at yourself from my viewpoint and you will know how confident you should be about your self

·       Above all STAY HAPPY … STAY HEALTHY … STAY HANDSOME… STAY AWESOME…

Love you Shaunak……
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SON!!!!!!!

What Saved me - (Promised sequel to What Owns me)

You may not know what I am talking about below if you have not read https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2019/08/what-owns-me-maybe.html so please read before going further 

Continuing from where l had left.....

Survival was at stake as my work computer had declined to boot. I sent a request to the IT department, but they couldn't do anything till I was back. The remote diagnosis was "can be a windows problem or a hardware issue"

My vote was in favor of hardware issue.

As I landed and rushed to my 1st client meeting of the day, the void deepened. I needed my computer and I needed my presentation. The pre-final copy in my email was good enough when it came to presentation deck. And one of my local team members salvaged the situation by lending his laptop for me to run the presentation on. 

Surviving through the days meetings, it was 7pm and I had no client meetings left for the day. Tomorrow Will be bigger with some key conversations in new client environments and a non-working computer is a bad start.

I picked my car and went on a rescue mission. Stop 1 was "Geek Squad". Who decided not to help (corporate machines cannot be externally booted due to legal complications) After 20 minutes of asking and pleading all I could gather was a lot of sympathy but no solution. They wanted to help, but couldn't and I could understand their reason for that policy.

Having tried some other means, I decided to take direct control of situation. Desperate times call for desperate measures. 

Next stop was a Target store and I was looking for a screwdriver set. They had the larger tools but no precision screwdrivers that I could use. "There is a home depot around 5 miles from here" one of Target employees suggested. I stepped out and then saw a "5 below" store right next to the Target. 20 minutes of going through the aisles, I had a watchmaker set for $3.

It was so precious, "the value of anything depends on its relevance at the time" one lesson that I re-learnt in that moment.

Back at hotel my desk was converted to a makeshift work bench and my computer body laid there, opened using the surgical tools aka watchmaker set from 5 below.

To my delight there indeed was a hardware problem. And an easily fixable one. The SSD card was lose and out of its slot. I pushed it back in the socket and it fit. Next was to put the retainer screw in place. And that is when I found the real culprit. The retainer screw head was smaller than needed. Most likely when this had gone for repair 4 moths back, the technician didn’t pay attention to the screw size. So, with passage of time and usual moves and shakes on the machine the SSD slid and with retainer screw being too small to hold, it slipped out and so the Hard drive was not found when I had tried to switch it on.  Lesson 2 of the day "small and seemingly insignificant details when ignored can prove their importance at worst time".  

A $300 SSD in a $1500 computer came undone because someone ignored the small, almost insignificant 2 cent retainer screw. And the screw proved its importance at a critical time.

I put the SSD back in slot tried some makeshift arrangement to make the retainer work. And the computer was working. Knowing that the solution was temporary, and I will eventually need a very expensive 2 cent screw to provide a lasting fix.

Eventually I handled my computer extremely delicately the next day during client meetings and in remaining of my travel. Finally, I was back in office after the travel  and the weekend that followed. Gave my machine to expert IT team for a permanent fix.

The two most important things that day were the retainer screw a 2-cent value item and the seemingly cheap watchmaker set for a couple of dollars. The issue was fixed. The work was done, and the lessons learnt were valuable.

So, in the end I didn't only survive but emerged richer with a lesson or two at the other end of situation.

What Owns me? ...Maybe....

Few months ago, I wrote a piece "What Owns You"

I was feeling, while writing that, that I am still not as of an "owned property" of a device or a service.  How naive was I?

That morning I woke up bright and early and reached airport for a flight to Chicago. I planned to be in Chicago for next 2 days l. Had multiple meetings with different customers. All good, or that I thought. 

As soon as I board the flight, my coworker emails a file that I had promised that I will review in my flight. I saw the email on my phone and pulled my laptop to download the file before the plane door closes. Don't like attempting to download anything on in plane WiFi. However, before digressing any further, I will continue; so, I attempted to turn my computer on, and it refused to boot. Hard drive not Installed is the error. That didn't appear like an error message but more like a "semi slaughter verdict" ^#

I’ve had same issue 4 months earlier when the manufacturer took 1 week to fix. 

That time it was not felt as harsh. I was in office when that happened and in no time, I had a loaner computer. But now in flight and travel for 2 days following the weekend, another 2 days so practically I might be without my computer for 4 days. That never happens. I am feeling too upset, almost depressed and certainly afraid. How will I survive the trip; how will I survive at all?

Survival seems in jeopardy since computer stopped working. That is where the ownership thought kicked back in. I was still in shock. Making many plans on how to survive next 2 days. Hope I will manage something. Hope it will not be a total disaster. The more I think, more depressed I get. So; work computer; you own me… maybe....

PS: The story doesn’t end here; I am writing this because I did survive; BUT HOW? That part hopefully soon.....

# Semi-slaughtered – A term borrowed from a coworker who used this to represent how he felt in a recent unfriendly meeting environment (can make for another story for another day 😊)

https://nuancesofbeing.blogspot.com/2017/06/what-owns-you.html

REUNION!!

Chisel a few pounds (or add a few in some cases), remove the salt from the salt and pepper hairlines. And there they were, nothing else seem to have changed. There the bunch was, the fun-loving college mates from more than 2 decades ago. We were not in the Hostels (old or new) anymore. Instead in a resort. We had no classes to skip today, for fun activities around the clock. 

Other common was the valleys around us. Not the dusty ones with harsh-weather-ravines from Deccan plateau in India, but lush green Appalachian Mountains of North America with its silky, silvery blue rivulets. But valleys are valleys and who better knows valleys than the one who has lived in Osmanabad.

1994

Any how the time was rolled back 20+ years for most of us. The festivities that lasted for a weekend. The fun, the food the dances the jokes and above all the togetherness as none of us had been staying apart for more than 2 decades.

2019

Spouses joined with equal zeal and familiarity as they have grown to know their respective spouse for years and what anyone of us was without our college experience. The kids got together as if those friendships were coded in their DNA.  And one observation was that although many children had grown into their teens or post teen years but most parents had not aged at all.

We all departed 2 days later, with promises of meeting again. Promises of staying in touch, promises of doing this frequently. And I for one remember similar promises made more than 20 years ago, while leaving the other building near the valleys, that I have not kept well. And I might not be the only one. However this time I am promising myself that I will commit to those promises and will not let them fade away under the day to day situations.

I know this time I will keep them, as I am more mature than I was 20 plus years ago.

I missed seeing some friends that I had known during college days and who could not join this reunion. I have vowed to share the stories and talks with them to make them feel what I felt (and may be make them envious too; after all what are friends for)

Next Gen 

The more I want to write about this the less words I am getting to justify what was lived and felt in those 2 days. I think that is what a beautiful experience is about, not enough words to express. (usually I am not short of words to write, but this was beyond what I can define in words)

So, friends if you were there, if you read it, let me know if you can fill in some better words more fitting the reunion.

I for now will bask in the memories for some time. So long till we meet again!!!

Referring to dictionary I find all the definitions very apt for what it was-

reunion

·         an instance of two or more people coming together again after a period of separation.

·         a social gathering attended by members of a certain group of people who have not seen each other for some time.

·         the act or process of being brought together again as a unified whole.

Despair to Hope

1: Despair – One word that most of the feelings can be summed up to these days. If you also think this way, believe me, you are not alone.

What else any rational thinker may feel when the news is all about Racial discrimination, Right wing politics gaining around the globe, terrorism, Drug use increasing, crime is becoming more commonplace, random shooting in malls, offices, educational institutions. Deforestation, pollution, Global warming while the industry and politics doing little more than lip service, at best, to contain it.

People who held the fort in last many decades, people who were respected for their ability to voice the balanced opinion are getting lesser in number and weaker in voice. The voice of the moderate; the middle ground is losing ground. And for moderates like me, the world is losing hope.

Despair and hopelessness, how ever you see it. And sometimes shame and anger at being a part of the race that is responsible for largest damage to the environment.

“Is there any hope for the future?” Many of us ask. And the answer mostly is Hopelessness and Despair.

2: Learning - Last week I was invited by my son to his school. The 7^th graders, my son included, were doing a “Passion project showcase”. My son has told me last night, that it is a project where you research the topic you are passionate about and present your research to the fellow students and the visitors.

Lately I have not been involved with my kids school as much as I should, due to my work commitments. However I am glad that I made that early morning trip to school.  These children, all in their preteen or early teen years, filled with energy and passion in that room. Happy and hopeful. Then I started moving from station to station to look at what each one of them is passionate about. As I moved my eyes widened and my mind sparked while my heart started sending blessings their way.

These children, the future, they gave me hope, for myself and for the world.

They are passionate about Music, Reading, Books, Oceans, Global warming, Art, Vedic science, LGBT rights, Asian food, Free North Korea, Marketing, Virtual Reality, Coaching Baseball, Websites, Graffiti, Animal Shelters, Dog care, Gun control to name a few.

I look at those boys and girls, the men and the women of future. The generation that will inherit the world from our generation. They were all passionate, and happy and bubbling with energy. The faces and the body language oozed commitment to their cause. The room was full of energy that each one of them was pulsating at. I could feel that energy in me. They were not only passionate about the topics but also had done deep research and could see how to fix, any problem in the domain they were passionate about. I learned that they care, and that learning was so liberating.

3: Hope - That learning was so liberating and so full of hope. I left that room with lot of gratitude for the teachers who are challenging the future citizens to be passionate about the causes that impact. Also; I had a lot respect and gratitude for the kids. However unwise our generation might have been to focus on technology and economy at the expense of humanity, values and the planet. But the damage our choices have caused, certainly have shown the next generation what is more important. I am hopeful that they will continue making the right choices. That they will not fall prey to false security of technology and economy at the cost of planet and humanity.
If at all; they will use and grow technology to heal wherever our generation has wounded. 
You are the Hope my sons and their friends. 
You are the Hope Passion Projects. 
You are the Hope Schools and Teachers. 
You are the Hope, FUTURE GENERATION!!!

Silent Refrigerator

“Is it cooling?” Yes. “Do the vegetables stay fresh?” Yes. “The freezer and ice maker are working?” Yes. “then what is the problem?”

“आवाज़ ही नहीं करता ” (It doesn’t make any sound) The lady says innocently. The service technician gives her an awesome smile and responds, “this is the new technology madam, it works silently.” And. We all laugh from the other side of the television screen.

This was a refrigerator commercial that was aired very regularly in India in eighties and nineties. Not sure if you may remember that commercial. It so vivid in my memory, that it plays in mind and always makes me smile.

How innocent and yet how wrong that consumer was. The refrigerator is doing its job fine, but still the owner calls for repair, because it stays silent. We all can laugh at that and it ends here. However, on a more serious note we all do something similar in our lives. Although not with refrigerators only, but also with people. And mostly people who matter.

I look around in families, society, schools, offices, politics, media and I see many such refrigerators. No one bothers if they freeze water to make ice or if they keep the vegetables cold and fresh; but are happy knowing that those make sound. And in the recent times at many places, the sound they make has become more important attribute than their performance at cooling.

And like refrigerators only times the need for cooling takes precedence over the sound is when the ‘sound maker’ has the vegetables rotten and the ice-cream has melted. But in most cases, it is too late when one discovers. The contents entrusted to the refrigerator are rotten already.

As parents, as teachers, as professionals as friends, as voters, as managers, as coaches, as mentors and as people, it is our responsibility to nurture and take care of those that are cooling with or without making sound. Cooling is the only important function for any refrigerator, sound is just a byproduct (wanted or unwanted)

We owe this to ourselves and to those who will follow. After all most of the past inventions that we all take for granted in our lives today had a “non-sound making refrigerator” (commonly called an introvert) behind them.

Holi Hai !!!

" बुरा ना मानो होली है !!" (Don’t feel bad it is holi)

Everyone who has grown up in India (or have watched hindi movies) must have heard this line. Truly Holi is the day when there is no reason to feel bad. Unlike Diwali the festival of lights celebrated as the victory of good over evil in the worldly sense. Holi is the time to celebrate the victory over ones own senses and enjoy. Cherish the blessings and the colorful surroundings. Demolish inner demons like greed, ego, anger, false pride.  Smear the friends and everyone in bright colors signifying the blessing that life is. Get yourself smeared in the colors and become a person who is clean, away from any anger and ego. With rainbow painted faces when one smiles and shows the white teeth, they appear silly and beautiful and pure.

In my schooling, college and early job years in India, I had always waited for Holi with great anticipation. My favorite festival as I had always said and believed. However, in last almost 2 decades living in the US, especially in the east coast with a cold march when the festival is and the job responsibilities have made the celebration almost non-existent. Watching photos and videos of family and friends in India from their Holi celebrations is the only solace. And then is taking a small amount of color usually after office on Holi and putting little dots on the beautiful faces of my wife and kids.

This year is different, Today was holi and I was not home, travelling for work. A few thousand miles away. This morning When I woke up in the hotel, it was very different from waking up on Holi in the past years. No one said Happy holi and no one heard me say Happy Holi.  Don’t feel bad it is Holi (बुरा ना मानो होली है !!) but I felt very bad because it was not any other day but Holi, and no one around. Tomorrow evening when I plan to reach home, holi will be over and I will have missed it. So how could I not feel bad?

With these thoughts I started my day and went for what I had planned at work. Still not able to shake it all off.

Then the holi miracle happened, My evening meeting got canceled, the key contact I was going to meet had developed an infection, early in the morning which worsened over the day and by noon he had to cancel the meeting. So I was freed up. And then I checked, the airline had a seat available in the evening flight that can take me home late at night. Late at night but today. So I will be home and will do our ritual of color in the evening (Okay! late night; but why be picky 😊) 

After all it is Holi and Bura na Mano Holi hai!!!

HAPPY HOLI ALL!!!!

PS: I reached home almost 10 minutes before midnight, and kids were asleep, so had a happy holi good-night kiss instead of colors. The picture above is from a year ago. No matter what; it was a very Happy and blessed Holi!